12 november, 2023 Wandering & Capturing Moments

 

 National Pizza with the Works Except Anchovies Day

Today's Name Day is Kristian

    I was not able to blog yesterday.   Sorry.  I got little to no sleep Friday night.  I cried most of the night over Nico.   I have so many guilt feelings that my poor choices is causing him to be ill & to die.

    Then I got word that MM was much worse.  Had had been sick for 3 days ---- severe pain, throwing up, no food, no meds.  He went to the ER in town.  Then they transferred him by ambulance to Salina.  That was the last straw.   KW took the kids to Wichita to their grandma & I went to the hospital to sit with MM.   The two little ones greeted me with hugs & love you's before leaving..  At least 5 times.   Sure needed those!!

    I just could not function last night to do anything.   I managed my Spanish lesson so I do not lose how many lessons I have done.  Guess it does not matter but that was all I did.

    No sleep last night.  On Saturday my hip quit hurting.  I was able to walk to the ER with ease.  And later back to my car.

    Went to bed.  Hip pain again & no sleep.  I cancelled today.  In pain, hard to walk, &  super depression.

    I should have forced myself to at least eat out tonight.  But I just did not have it in me.  I want to see MM so bad but KW  is with him & they both write me often.

    I tried to nap today but could not.  I changed the blanket on the sofa which is nice.  I spent the afternoon editing photos & sorting photos I have.  It was sort of relaxing.  Did not cook for supper but that is ok.  Just for me so what does it matter.  If I lived in town I could have ordered in.  If I just had someone who could bring me food but god forbid there be someone for me.  I have only me to depend on.  Refused to ask KW.  Too far to drive.   It is really tough to lose most family & have few friends.   Alone is not good or fun.   And, of course, no one but MM offered help.  No one else for me.

    Weather is ok.  We had a little rain yesterday morning.  Did not get much but it smelled nice.

    Tonight I set up a new diffuser.  I am using the essential oil Autumn Eternity Blend.  Smells nice.

    This afternoon I was a long program about Normandy & all the new information that they are finding.  Very interesting.

    I apologize for whining about my life.  I try to stay quiet.  I learned fast that when Willie died I became invisible to all of his friends.  That has not changed.  Nor will it.  And with several chronic diseases,  your learn fast that no one cares or wants to know.  So I try to keep quiet.  In the car yesterday on the way to the hospital. I actually did some yelling.  😵  Needed to do that!!  Have to do that more often!!!  Hope no one could read my lips!!

    Photos are mostly from out here.  Might be an odd one or two.  I will try to be in a better mood tomorrow.

                        

09 november, 2023 Wandering & Capturing Moments

 Today's Name Day is Teodor

    This morning was ok but this afternoon was not.  Difficult times for me plus a change in the weather is attacking my body.

    Cannot write today.  My mind is whirling.  No need to complain.  Told I should be used to this.  I am tired of being alone with no support other than it is what it is.  FML.

    Photos are of our cattle.  One shows how much dust there is when someone drives down our road.

            

                

08 november, 2023 Wandering & Capturing Moments

 Today's Name Day is Vendela

    Had an ok day.  Slept pretty good.  So did Nico.  But he scared me this morning.  He was all stretched out asleep.  I petted & shook him but nothing.  When I called his name he woke up.  Not ready for the inevitable.  His eyes are not good.  Makes me so sad.  I am a terrible mom to him.  None of this should have happened to him.  I am sooo sorry.

    Took a short nap.  Drinking my power drinks yesterday did not bother my sleep much.

    JR & I got our Covid booster shots.  The text I get from a medical site that has said there is no or little flu/Covid here.  But yesterday they said there is more here now.  Glad we got our shots.  Had it once.  That is enough.

    We had supper at Jalisco's.  They got very busy then they all left.  When we left it was filling up again.

    It was cooler today.  With heavy fog this morning again.  This morning was perfect.  Calm winds & clouds.  Cattle near my yard.  No chance of rain from now through next week.  Too dry.  And not getting better.  Driving on the dirt roads are just awful.  So much dirt flying that I cannot see if I am meeting one car or more.

    At JR's house we found a HUGE leaf!!  No idea what tree it came from.  I photographed it.  Worked out great as my photos for tonight are photos of leaves I have taken.  My trees are losing leaves but no pretty colors.  Losing from the drought.

                

  

   

                

   

07 november, 2023 Wandering & Capturing Moments

National Hug a Bear Day 😊

Today's Name Day is Ingegerd

    I am in little better mood today.  No tears.  Weather is still irritating my RA.  Lots of pain but I can walk better.

    Nico must feel better today.  I think he is losing his eye sight.  I was told this might happen.  I ordered some medical liquid from Amazon.  Surely won't hurt him.  Have a vet who cannot help him hurts the most.  Even if it helps just a little that will be nice.  Get it tomorrow.

    Nico & I sat outside for a long time this afternoon.  Cinder was a with us.  I took dozens of photos of them together.  They will be special later on.  Got some nice ones.  I used Baazart to remove Nico's leash.  Makes for nicer photos.  He used to go outside without a leash but he at some point of he started running off & would not mind me or come back.  I was always outside but did not matter.  Now there are just too many dangerous things out there --- bob cats, big dogs, coyotes, even mountain lions nearby.  Or the cattle if he roams in the pasture.

    After lunch today I went to Falun to vote.  Sort of a waste of time.  Voting on school board.  I only knew one of them.  And one had no address.  How can you run for the school board with no address?  Sheesh.  Took me less than 10 minutes to vote.

    Pretty nice weather.  Warm with a nice breeze. Cooling off tonight & then cooler weather is here.  We have around 0% chance of rain this week.  Nice.  I had not emptied my rain gauge for a while.  I need to look more often! There was 3 inches in it!!!  Had more than I realized.

    Cinder stayed home last night.  Saved me a panic attack!  Came in to sleep in "her" recliner!!  First time in she was in bed with me.

    A couple of days ago I had someone who  had common ancestors with me.  Back in the 1500s.  That is rather special.  To find someone connected to me that long ago.  Even though a long long time ago, I am still part of them.  And they are part of me.  Very cool.  And I always learn something about that time in the world or country or both.  Learning is always good.

    I heard from both grandsons & photos of my great grandson.  That always make my heart swell!  He is so special!  I am so lucky.

    Photos today are of Swedish tomtes & most are Christmassy photos.  Love them.  I wanted something light hearted.

                

 

06 november, 2023 Wandering & Capturing Moments

 

National Nachos Day

Today's Name Day is Gustav, Adolph

       I had a solitary day.  Everyone was busy & quiet.  I slept so-so.  Stayed too warm all night.  Probably the same tonight.

    Yesterday the Smoky Valley looked pretty blue.  Today the air was clear.  It was foggy this morning but I missed it.  Supposed to be foggy tomorrow until almost noon.  I will see it.  Getting up to go vote.

    I took Nico out & sat for a long time.  Did us both good.  I played with my new camera on my iPhone.  The pond was all shiny looking.  And then the cattle came near my driveway.  I could zoom in to get pictures of them.

    I tried to nap but my mind was running at top speed.  I am so upset about Nico.  Every day is so unknown.  What will I do without him?  I think he does not feel the best today.  Where is Willie when I desperately need him?  Not told most people.  They all have their own troubles.

    I did talk briefly with JS.  He was at the docs with his partner.

    JR & I are getting our Covid shots this week.  I get notices from a medical site on how much Covid/flu is increasing here.  Great.  I have one friend who is terribly ill.  Not Covid, but really really bad.  Hope I do to get that.  I am about ready to start wearing a mask again.  No bueno.

    Last night when I got home after supper, Cinder was sitting on the porch.  But she would not come in. Then I never saw her again until almost noon today.  Because of Nico, I was almost in a panic!  I cannot lose her also.  I called every time Nico & I were outside.  Nada.  She stayed in until just now.  I ordered her quietly to not run away again!!

    Photos are seasonal.  Some I have created.  I found a cool app for collages.  Easy & looks cool.

    We have a small cold front coming & it has played havoc with my RA.  I could barely walk all last night.  Almost tried crawling.  Awful pain.  No creams helped at all.

                    

05 november, 2023 Wandering & Capturing Moments

National Redhead Day

Today's Name Day is Eugen

    Had an extra long night!  No idea why!  Time just moved sooo slow!!  Nico had me up several times until around 4am.  Then we all slept & cuddled.    

    It got much colder than I expected last night.  I saw 39.  I had trouble getting warm!!  Today was 70 with a little breeze.  Sat out with Nico for a bit.  The pond was sparkly & calm.

    Supper was at Pizza Hut.  We had a nice greeting. 😊 Supposed to meet a friend there, but he never showed.  Too bad.

    Had a nice visit with JR.  Came home to get Cinder in.  Been out all day.

    Photos are some pretty tree photos from 2 years ago.  And a collage from old cars next door to me.  And a collage from Lindsborg.